The Next Chapter..

Dear not Really sure who (but anyway)


I started blogging not long after my last serious ex and I broke up,
It was my release,my unleashing of all the pain (hence the name)
however this was not my first blog,,
The first blog I started unfortunately suffered that not so uncommon fate of the irretrievable password (sad but true)
However I remained Resolute and the reality of this blog was born.


Did you know that When one begins a blog,there is a momentary pause,a moment when every hateful,hurtful and hopeless thing you ever wanted to let loose,fights valiantly to the surface of your consciousness in the vain attempt to finally achieve it's release.
And for that moment you ponder your options,,


Should one simply give in to the inevitable explosion of the horrifying reality that lies clamourously within you?? (it would be so easy- a few strokes here and there an easy enter and boom,your inner secrets revealed)
Or does one do (yet again) the polite thing ?
Bottling it all up again and writing some mundane trivia on shall we say the weather...
Inevitably we all know that there'll be a release,a not so subtle explosion of tragic feelings from a forgotten cause (or not so forgotten,depending on the victim)Whereby every past grievance comes out to play
A frightening game of duck duck goose,not it.Or pass the buck as they'd say in days gone by.


And so,for that infinitesimal moment I pondered My predicament and all the choices I had made that had brought me to that point.And as my fingers hovered over the key board,so tempted to begin.I begun the journey that would lead to some surprising discoveries of not only who I am but also What I am (I am not an alien for all you Imaginative Dumbasses!!)


So for those who've taken the time to actually read my blog will no doubt guess ,I decided on option 3(yes I know I didnt list an option 3,get over it)
Option 3 consisted of me doing everything in option 1,releasing all the bottled up hurts and pains but with the slight benefit of option 2 without the backlash (well I maintain my hope in that regard )
In lamens terms I released my pain through my writing but I didnt attack those responsible for causing the pain.
The truth is,when one really takes the time to think about it,is that the pain one feels and the overwhelming thirst for revenge is nothing compared to the eventual release of that pain,when one finally gains the courage to realize that though some uncaring and despicable fool had the audacity to hurt you,in the end they do not have the power to heal you again (only you do)
You alone have control,so when you get over the injustice of it all and wipe all your tears away,after all the anger dissipates.be prepared to go on the journey of your life,for the release of the past brings forth the joys and excitement and all the unpredictability of the future.And yes of course you'll still have bad days but the reality is even those are within your power to resolve.


There was hatred before,doused in pain and consumed by jealousy it was hard to see the way out.So very hard to maintain the happy front,that smiling exterior that fooled so many.
But as the saying goes where there is a will there's a way and My will is and was very strong.
I kept so many blinded by my smile that eventually It had me screaming inside (can you not see,look closely!!)
But that was then and this is now..and this is not a release of all my past grievances,,that ship sailed,sunk resurfaced and got washed away.(I know kinda funny,but true.)
This is the journey's path,the final chapter in an otherwise elusive end
The goodbye to all the once hoped for and held dear notions that became the shackles to the future.


Quite simply Dear Reader (if you're there)
this is just the final thank you's,which though normally at the beginning of a story are at the end of mine.
This does not mean I will quit writing,of course not! nor will this be the end of my blog,nope. this is merely the beginning of the next chapter,the second act of my life .
So thank you to my Inspirations,the ex who inspired me to begin a blog to begin with even if decapitating him was really my first choice.
The friends and family and even strangers who have all had a role in inspiring some of my works.and have sweetly cheered me on.
and finally to words themselves for never leaving me without a line.


So Onwards towards the future..
Farewell past,,The Next Chapter has Begun..

Awakened Future